What’s in Your Mental Health Toolkit? Anxiety Management Tips from a Washington Based Therapist.
When you think of a toolkit, what comes to mind? Maybe you picture a worn leather bag, filled with useful tools that have been collected over time – each one added with intention, ready to help in just the right moment.
In my work as a therapist supporting individuals and couples here in Washington State, the idea of a “mental health toolkit” comes up often. One of the goals in therapy is helping clients build their resources, exploring supportive tools and practices that can help them feel more grounded and resilient in everyday life.
Just like a physical toolbox, your mental health toolkit is uniquely yours. It can include people, places, activities, and sensory items – anything that helps you feel more connected to yourself when life gets overwhelming. These tools aren’t just for crisis moments; they’re meant to be practiced and used regularly so that when you do hit a rough patch, they’re easier to access.
Because let’s be real: when we’re dysregulated, when we’re feeling outside of our “window of tolerance”, our brains aren’t in a place to make thoughtful decisions. That part of the brain responsible for logic and problem-solving tends to go offline, making it tough to choose something helpful in the moment. This is why building "mental muscle memory" is so important. The more you practice using your toolkit, the more instinctive it becomes, even on the hard days.
Before diving in with clients, I’ll explore what dysregulation actually feels like to them. Sometimes we can feel “hyperaroused” – anxious, overwhelmed, agitated. Other times we may feel “hypoaroused” – numb, shut down, lethargic. Understanding your own experience helps you create a toolkit that suits you and your needs.
Here is the guide I offer clients as a starting point:
Activities
Brainstorm 2 activities that ground you and 2 that energize you.
Examples: going for a walk with your favorite soundtrack, playing your comfort video game, dancing/moving, doing a 10 minute breath exercise.
People
Think of a few people you trust, those who can hold space for you without judgement.
Reach out with a text or ask for a call if it feels doable.
Places
List a few nearby places where you tend to feel more at ease.
Examples: your favorite park, the local bookstore, the pier.
Things (Sensory Tools)
Engaging your senses is a powerful way to bring yourself back to the present moment.
Smell – Use a fragrant lotion you like, sniff some essential oils, light a candle.
Touch – Weighted blanket/plush, snuggle with your pet if you have one, bare feet on grass.
Taste – Sour candies, strong mints, or something with an intense flavor.
Sight – Step outside or look out your window and list off things you can see. Mental visualization of your “happy place".” What does it look like? What’s happening around you?
Sound – Put on a playlist that either grounds you or amps you up, depending on what you need.
The beauty of the mental health toolkit is that it’s personal, flexible, and can evolve with you over time. There is no one size fits all approach to coping, and it is important to experiment to find what you actually reach for and feel helpful in times of need. This can be a living document, tailored to specific moods or feelings, whatever works best for you.
Think of your toolkit as a gentle companion – something to reach for when you're feeling off-balance, but also something to practice with when you’re feeling okay. That way, when you really need it, it’s already familiar and accessible. The more you get to know your toolkit, the more you’ll discover that you already have what you need to care for yourself – right within reach.
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Let’s Connect
I'm Kelsey Graham, owner of Fen & Fir Counseling, offering virtual individual and couples therapy to clients across Spokane and Washington state.
If this message resonates with you and you’re ready to take the next step, I invite you to reach out for a free consultation:
https://kelsey-graham.clientsecure.me/
I would be honored to support you.
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Disclaimer: this post is intended for educational and entertainment purposes only. It does not substitute or provide mental help.